I guess you think you know this story. You don't. The real one's much more gory. The phoney one, the one you know, Was cooked up years and years ago, And made to sound all soft and sappy just to keep the children happy. Mind you, they got the first bit right, The bit where, in the dead of night, the ugly Sisters, jewels and all, Departed for the Palace Ball, While darling little Cinderella was locked up in the slimy cellar, where rats who wanted things to eat, began to nibble at her feet. She bellowed, "Help!" and "Let me out!" The magic fairy heard her shout.